TEACHER: Johny, how do you spell "crocodile"?
JOHNY: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
JOHNY: "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
JOHNY: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
JOHNY: Maybe it's wrong, but you ask me how I spell it!
Tuesday, 27 May 2014
Cant lie till Z
A : u r Active
B : u r Best
C : u r Cute
D : u r my Dearest
E : u r Excelant
F : u r alwayz First
G : u r Great
Sorry cant lie till Z...
B : u r Best
C : u r Cute
D : u r my Dearest
E : u r Excelant
F : u r alwayz First
G : u r Great
Sorry cant lie till Z...
A person who keeps on talking...
Teacher : What do you call a person
who keeps on talking when
people are no longer interested?
who keeps on talking when
people are no longer interested?
Pupil : A teacher.
Difference b/w secretary & private secretary
Q: What is the difference b/w secretary & private secretary?
Ans:
Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR
&
Private secretary says ITS MORNING SIR
Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR
&
Private secretary says ITS MORNING SIR
Dont underestimate the power of a WIFE
A woman went shopping, At cash counter she opened her purse to pay.
The cashier noticed a TV remote in her purse.
He cud'nt control his curiosity n asked
"Do u always carry ur TV remote with u?"
She replied " No, not always, but my husband refused to accompany me for shopping today..
The cashier noticed a TV remote in her purse.
He cud'nt control his curiosity n asked
"Do u always carry ur TV remote with u?"
She replied " No, not always, but my husband refused to accompany me for shopping today..
The story continues....
The shopkeeper laughs and takes back all the items that lady had purchased.
Shocked at this act, she asks the shopkeeper what is he doing.
He said your husband has blocked your credit card.
MORAL : Respect the hobbies of your husband.
Shocked at this act, she asks the shopkeeper what is he doing.
He said your husband has blocked your credit card.
MORAL : Respect the hobbies of your husband.
Story continues....
Wife took out his husbands credit card from purse
and uses it to clear all the bills.
Unfortunately he didn't block his own card.
Moral:...... Dont underestimate the power of a WIFE.
and uses it to clear all the bills.
Unfortunately he didn't block his own card.
Moral:...... Dont underestimate the power of a WIFE.
Lecture on Sun
Teacher: Tomorrow there will be a lecture on Sun.
Everyone must attend it.
Raju: No! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher: Why?
Raju: My mother will not allow me to go so far !!
Everyone must attend it.
Raju: No! I will not be able to attend it.
Teacher: Why?
Raju: My mother will not allow me to go so far !!
Do u want to hear a dirty joke
Do u want to hear a dirty joke?
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.
Are you sure?
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.
Ok, here you go...
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A white horse fell in the mud
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Are you sure?
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Ok, here you go...
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A white horse fell in the mud
Importance of thumb...
Importance of thumb...
Children use it 4 chewing
Illiterate people use it 4 sign
Winners 4 victory
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.
AND
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My FANS use it 4 reading my messages
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Oh....u toooo?
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AND
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My FANS use it 4 reading my messages
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Oh....u toooo?
I almost cried
Life has so much 2 teach us,1 famous Chinese poet said
"Sifgliyo chi chongloma cyona sung una sevol ping pinago ching"
"Sifgliyo chi chongloma cyona sung una sevol ping pinago ching"
Really touching na?
I almost cried;->
I almost cried;->
How to get your brain exercised
2 friends,
"see" & "saw":
1 day "see" saw sea & "saw" didnt see sea.
"See" saw sea and jumped in sea.
"Saw" didnt see sea but jumped in sea.
"See" saw "saw" in sea & "saw" saw "see" in sea.
"See" "saw" both saw sea & both "saw" & "see" were happy to see Sea.
"See" saw sea and jumped in sea.
"Saw" didnt see sea but jumped in sea.
"See" saw "saw" in sea & "saw" saw "see" in sea.
"See" "saw" both saw sea & both "saw" & "see" were happy to see Sea.
That is how to exercise your brain..
Read this scary story if you dare
READ THIS SCARY STORY IF YOU DARE.
On a rainy day,
an old man was standing with a book for sale.
A young man came to buy.
He bought the book for Rs.3000.
Old man advised
"DONT OPEN LAST PAGE OF THE BOOK othrwise YOU'll face problem"
Man finished the book with great fear but didnt open the last page.
.
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.
But,after a week,
Out of curiousity he opend the last page and..
On a rainy day,
an old man was standing with a book for sale.
A young man came to buy.
He bought the book for Rs.3000.
Old man advised
"DONT OPEN LAST PAGE OF THE BOOK othrwise YOU'll face problem"
Man finished the book with great fear but didnt open the last page.
.
.
.
But,after a week,
Out of curiousity he opend the last page and..
he almost fainted to see..
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Retail Price: Rs 30/-
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Retail Price: Rs 30/-
Fact about women
Fact about women:
They can see a hair of a girl
on their husband's coat from 20 meters,
but can't see a pillar from 2 meters
while parking a car . . . :-D
They can see a hair of a girl
on their husband's coat from 20 meters,
but can't see a pillar from 2 meters
while parking a car . . . :-D
Miss use of english
Misuse of English!
A Diagram in A Book Was Not Clear
So da Teacher Drew The Diagram On Da Blackboard
&
said:
"Dont Look At The Book Figure,Look At My Figure":D
So da Teacher Drew The Diagram On Da Blackboard
&
said:
"Dont Look At The Book Figure,Look At My Figure":D
How is the situation
Husband wanted to call the hospital
to ask about his pregnant wife,
but accidently called the cricket stadium.
to ask about his pregnant wife,
but accidently called the cricket stadium.
He asks, "How's the situation?"
He was shocked & nearly died on hearing the reply.
They said, "It's fine. 3 are out,
hope to get another 7 out by lunch,
last one was a duck!"..:-P
hope to get another 7 out by lunch,
last one was a duck!"..:-P
